ACTIVITY: The Ten-Year Regret Test
“How will you feel about this decision ten years from now?”
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Every so often, I’ll suggest a short activity to help you feel less overwhelmed and more purposeful. You should be able to complete it in less than 15 minutes.
How do you make big decisions?
Most of us do so with a combination of head and heart (or “math” and “magic” if you prefer). You might make a pros and cons list, considering the costs and benefits of a particular course of action. Alternatively, you might proceed entirely based on intuition.
Here’s a third way to do it. When faced with a choice, ask yourself:
“How will I feel about this decision ten years from now?”
This question helps to filter out the noise of the present moment and reduce the weight of immediate pressures that might lead to you deferring the decision. (Remember, not making a choice is making a choice.)
Should I change jobs or pursue a new career path?
Should I move to a new city or country?
Should I go back to school?
Is it time to commit to or end a relationship?
Should I spend more time on hobbies that don’t generate income but make me happy?
In many cases, the ten-year regret test will produce an immediate answer. If so, that’s great—you now have what you need.
But what about when your answer is “I don’t know”? Ah, so here’s where it gets interesting. One solution is: focus on what feels right for the next step.
For example, if you aren’t sure whether you should pursue a college or graduate school course, think about how it feels to apply for it. Based on what happens after that, you can always ask the question again later when you have more information.
* The ten-year regret test is based on a concept from the ever-prolific . Thanks, Dan!
That last one rocks. When I finally realized there is no shame in loving the work I do whether it makes money or not, everything changed. And now when visitors come to my studio and I'm sharing my stories of how I found my way through, I listen to their stories, help them realize their own creativity matters, and encourage them to do the work they love that makes them happy. Because it helps them manage everything else in their life. I've learned that being a force of good for other people and for the world is what makes us truly joyful. Thank you for sharing this insight today, I hope it helps other people too.
Sorry Chris, this is one of your few bits of advice that I can't fully get behind. Whilst the concept is probably right, anyone's prediction of a 10 year outcome should not be based on how it feels. I've some enormous regrets about decisions I have made over the last 2 decades based on the feeling at the time. On reflection I can objectively identify the flaws in my thinking; and sure, hindsight is 20/20, but had I done my due diligence back then, I might be better off now. Stepping back and critically assessing your options with all available data, from an objective and detached perspective - even where love and happiness is a variable - is a going to lead to a better outcome than than imagining how something might feel.