ACTIVITY: The Reverse Bucket List
Make a list of the amazing things you’ve already done. 📋
As someone who tends to be future-minded, I struggle in appreciating what I’ve already done. This exercise was especially helpful to me, as it brought a number of things to mind that I’d totally forgotten about until I focused on them.
I’d like to introduce you to the Reverse Bucket List. It’s like a bucket list—a list of lifelong goals—only instead of looking forward, the reverse bucket list looks back.
In the pursuit of future goals, we often overlook the milestones we've already achieved. So instead of skipping over all of your past accomplishments, consider making a list of them. It’s like a bucket list—just, well, in reverse.
Start your list with the obvious things that come to mind, in whatever categories you think of, but don’t stop there. A good bucket list (as in, one that contains goals for the future) usually features items from a range of different categories: personal, professional, “adventure-y,” and so on.
Do the same for your Reverse Bucket List: diversify the categories so you can reflect on many different things you’ve already accomplished. Be proud of yourself!
What have you done that’s interesting or different? (By your own standards, of course.)
What have you got right with relationships?
What’s something you feel especially proud of?
How have you shown up for someone important—either yourself or someone you care for?
What’s a hard thing you managed to see through and overcome?
Finally, the Reverse Bucket List can be more than just a trip down memory lane. It might inspire you to set some new goals, or to revisit previous accomplishments and tackle them again in a new way.
I spend most of my time looking toward the future or trying to appreciate the present. The Reverse Bucket List helped me to appreciate “past Chris” in a way that’s sometimes hard for me.
Try it out for yourself. 💚
See Also
Conversation Starters
Have you ever made a regular bucket list? What’s on it?
How do you divide your focus and attention between the past, present, and future?
What’s one thing you’re proud of yourself for?
I got out of bed this morning
I decided to approach this by thinking about the things I wanted as a kid to do as an adult, then I moved on:
[things I wanted to do as a kid and have accomplished]
I learned a foreign language fluently enough to have philosophical conversations and read the news and literature.
I live in Europe.
I have a doctorate degree.
I make music for a living.
I play well enough that people ask me to be involved in their projects.
I live in a yellow building with a turret (which is part of my apartment).
I’ve spent time in Italy, which I was fascinated with as a kid (probably because it’s so recognizable on a map and because we would go to the North End for pizza).
[relationships]
I’ve always had good friends.
I have a fantastic wife.
I’ve had the opportunity to involve people in my projects or recommend them to others.
[showing up for someone]
My kid. I mean, it has been far from perfect, but I’ve learned a lot about what he needs (and through that what other people need, which is loving observation much of the time) and I am seeing him become calmer.
[a hard thing] [pride]
I had a flute teacher from whom I didn’t get what I needed and I didn’t understand what she was trying to give. There was a big communication issue — not just with me, but with all the students. She would never get mad or yell or even really berate you, but she would always be very disappointed and convinced that you didn’t have your priorities straight. needless to say, it took me a long time to get that person out of my head, but there was something inside me — I was convinced that I could be a good enough musician and I kept at it. I found a teacher after I graduated who was able to explain everything that was missing from my playing in a way that was encouraging, like anybody can do this. through that I was able to let go of what I did not get from the previous teacher. (Many of my colleagues, thankfully, were able to figure this out for themselves, too). I am glad that I stuck to my guns, found help, and worked it out.
1. I have never made a bucket list. I'm not sure I want to, but I'll think about it some more.
2. I think I am constantly rotating between past, present, and future at a pretty rapid pace. This may need some attention.
3. Becoming the kind of musician I've always wanted to be.