“What am I grateful for?” “How can I make the world a better place tonight than it was this morning?” As you said - questions like “What the hell is wrong with me???” provide limitless answers, none of them productive or empowering. I wear tee shirts a lot, and I do my best to select ones that speak my values and uplift others: “More Pride, Less Prejudice “ with a likeness of Jane Austen wearing rainbow glasses. “Dear person behind me, the world is a better place because you are in it. Love, the person in front of you” (printed on the back of the shirt), “Equal rights for others does not mean fewer rights for you - it’s not pie”, and “= > •/•”. I also have one that’s less for others and more for me on “those” days : “Don’t be realistic at me - it’s not the day for it”
For the gratitude piece, I write down 5 things every morning and evening- some days it’s deep and meaningful, some days it’s more like - “I didn’t break any bones” or “I didn’t get a speeding ticket”. There’s always something g - even on the suckiest of days.
That’s a good one! The «what Am I Grateful for» questions are not working well for me at this time in my life. I will have to do a little twist and your question is very helpful.
Very nice anecdote and insight from that indeed! I am curious about your dominant question though - seems there's an underlying presupposition that your day needs to matter. Does it? And if it does, what qualifies a day mattering?
Excellent points Chris. I share many of the same feelings.
2 things that helped me are…
‘Action is the foundational key to success.’ - Picasso
While action does not guarantee success, inactivity does guarantee failure.
And…
On bad days, i ask myself, what can i do to move things forward?
So while i may not meet my expectations fully, i don’t have to give up on the day. It might mean going to the gym, washing the truck, organizing receipts, cleaning my desk, going for a walk, making some phone calls. Knocking out a few low-hanging green check-marks can allow me to have satisfaction while allowing myself grace.
Mine is not really a question.. but it helps me when I’m feeling discouraged “remember why you started in the first place... pick yourself up and Keep Going.
While I’m sure there were those who appreciated the hot chocolate, for me it will always be frozen hot chocolate off the secret menu at Dunkin. On the days with little to look forward to and you are allowed to yell at no one but must accept their yelling with a neutral look on your face, frozen hot chocolate makes life worth living or at least allows me the grace to live another day. Infinite blessings to all during the heat wave.
Oooh LOVE this!!! I'm a massive fan of asking questions at work, in 1:1 convos, etc. but I've never thought of framing this as "what are my dominant questions"? I'm going to have a think on what my dominant questions are!!! 🙏🏼
Wow..this post is spotted by me in the right moment to break my negativethoughts. 'How am I able to use the time I have right now to the best of my ability to make me more valuable" will be my dominant question from now.
Dealing with hardship, I started to accumulate small wins and learnings. That’s the best question for folks who feel stuck: What is the smallest possible learning I can add to my stack?
Great thought provoking post! I think asking myself questions is one of the most things I often do in a day. And so there are often hundreds, good, bad and indifferent. 🫥 But I like using the one that physicist Cynthia Sue Larson has coined and that is ‘How good can it get?’
My dominant questions have been predominantly negative at the moment. I’ve noticed how it’s put me in a negative feedback loop of me trying to control things I can’t and try to change myself constantly. Thank you for giving some guiding questions to get me out of this funk.
“What am I grateful for?” “How can I make the world a better place tonight than it was this morning?” As you said - questions like “What the hell is wrong with me???” provide limitless answers, none of them productive or empowering. I wear tee shirts a lot, and I do my best to select ones that speak my values and uplift others: “More Pride, Less Prejudice “ with a likeness of Jane Austen wearing rainbow glasses. “Dear person behind me, the world is a better place because you are in it. Love, the person in front of you” (printed on the back of the shirt), “Equal rights for others does not mean fewer rights for you - it’s not pie”, and “= > •/•”. I also have one that’s less for others and more for me on “those” days : “Don’t be realistic at me - it’s not the day for it”
For the gratitude piece, I write down 5 things every morning and evening- some days it’s deep and meaningful, some days it’s more like - “I didn’t break any bones” or “I didn’t get a speeding ticket”. There’s always something g - even on the suckiest of days.
These are priceless. 💜
love that dear person behind me tshirt slogan
I like asking myself "how could this be easy / simple / fun?" Forces my brain to seek creative solutions!
That’s a good one! The «what Am I Grateful for» questions are not working well for me at this time in my life. I will have to do a little twist and your question is very helpful.
This is lovely. I love thinking about this. Here is what comes to mind:
How can this be art?
It invites reflection, encourages a positive perspective and provides a challenge. I have to remember this.
Very nice anecdote and insight from that indeed! I am curious about your dominant question though - seems there's an underlying presupposition that your day needs to matter. Does it? And if it does, what qualifies a day mattering?
I think that's a lovely interpretation and ideology to live by. 😊
Excellent points Chris. I share many of the same feelings.
2 things that helped me are…
‘Action is the foundational key to success.’ - Picasso
While action does not guarantee success, inactivity does guarantee failure.
And…
On bad days, i ask myself, what can i do to move things forward?
So while i may not meet my expectations fully, i don’t have to give up on the day. It might mean going to the gym, washing the truck, organizing receipts, cleaning my desk, going for a walk, making some phone calls. Knocking out a few low-hanging green check-marks can allow me to have satisfaction while allowing myself grace.
Mine is not really a question.. but it helps me when I’m feeling discouraged “remember why you started in the first place... pick yourself up and Keep Going.
I also like to say “remember why” to myself.
Yes I do too ! 🤗
While I’m sure there were those who appreciated the hot chocolate, for me it will always be frozen hot chocolate off the secret menu at Dunkin. On the days with little to look forward to and you are allowed to yell at no one but must accept their yelling with a neutral look on your face, frozen hot chocolate makes life worth living or at least allows me the grace to live another day. Infinite blessings to all during the heat wave.
Oooh LOVE this!!! I'm a massive fan of asking questions at work, in 1:1 convos, etc. but I've never thought of framing this as "what are my dominant questions"? I'm going to have a think on what my dominant questions are!!! 🙏🏼
Wow..this post is spotted by me in the right moment to break my negativethoughts. 'How am I able to use the time I have right now to the best of my ability to make me more valuable" will be my dominant question from now.
Dealing with hardship, I started to accumulate small wins and learnings. That’s the best question for folks who feel stuck: What is the smallest possible learning I can add to my stack?
Great thought provoking post! I think asking myself questions is one of the most things I often do in a day. And so there are often hundreds, good, bad and indifferent. 🫥 But I like using the one that physicist Cynthia Sue Larson has coined and that is ‘How good can it get?’
My dominant questions have been predominantly negative at the moment. I’ve noticed how it’s put me in a negative feedback loop of me trying to control things I can’t and try to change myself constantly. Thank you for giving some guiding questions to get me out of this funk.
Fantastic post. I love all of your dominant question suggestions, especially Will Smith's 'how can I make this experience more magical?' 💜
My main dominant question is “what’s the next right thing to do?” That’s not to say it’s always easy to do it but I do my best to!
This is wonderful Chris. Thank you
I have 3 kids and lately I have been reminding myself to remember the JOY in parenting as opposed to the JOB of parenting.
However, I think I will adopt Will Smiths question of "how can I make today more magical?", which is very fitting for raising kids.
Plus, my license plate is "magical" (well, a slightly different spelling due to that exact word being taken).