The Space Between Spaces: Reflections on Moving
Thoughts on relocation, big or small.
I recently changed office locations from a space I’d had for more than a decade. The move wasn’t terribly difficult, at least as moves go, but it still felt like an emotionally significant change.
When you move from one space to another, you think about a lot of things.
Well, at first you don’t think much at all, because you have a lot to do. And inevitably it takes more time than you expect. There should be a law of moving house or office: “Whatever time you budget, add x hours.”
Even if the final outcome is positive, the process usually sucks. Organization goes out the window. Something breaks. The movers are late, or your friend who was going to help doesn’t show up.
Maybe you’re doing it all yourself, which is admirable! But then you start to feel overwhelmed. It’s harder than you thought. You strain your back lifting something you shouldn’t.
You resolve to become a minimalist, or more of one than you already are. You commit to stop attracting so much stuff.
Why do I still have this, you ask yourself more than once as you go through closets and drawers. Answers include:
Because it seemed like a good idea at the time
I thought I might need it later, so I kept it just in case
I knew I didn’t need it, but I didn’t know what to do with it
You begin the moving process by telling yourself you’ll only bring items into your new space that you definitely want to keep. A new space is a new beginning, after all.
But then you get tired, and there’s still more stuff to go through, so you get lazy and start shoving things into boxes. I’ll sort it out over there, you decide.
“The line between disorder and order lies in logistics,” Sun Tzu said. (When he wasn’t writing The Art of War, apparently he had a side business helping college students move out of dorms.)
But somewhere amidst the process and the logistics, you start getting reflective.
Who was I when I first lived in this space? Who am I now?
What did I not know then, but now do?
What do I wish I could go back to, and what am I glad to have moved on from?
Perhaps you feel a sense of relief to be leaving something behind. But most likely it’s at least partly bittersweet. You’re excited for your new life, across town or in a new city, but you already know you’ll miss some parts of the old one.
Life Is About Noticing
From time to time, Keanu Reeves goes re-viral for his answer to a question on what happens when we die. The answer: “I know that the ones who love us will miss us.”1
Another quote that’s attributed to him (I couldn’t find a definitive source): “The simple act of paying attention can take you a long way.”
Paying attention is important! In many ways, life is about what we notice and what we miss.
And moving, or any point of change, can be a turning point. You get to decide: what comes next? Who will I be in this new space?
For me, the beauty in this answer comes partly from its succinctness. Watching the short video, it’s almost as though you expect him to say more—but then he doesn’t, and that’s what makes it so perfect.
I just want to say thank you, so many of your posts have hit at the right time but this one...just what I needed to hear today as I'm contemplating some big changes.
Ahhh, what an amazing Keanu quote. That man has had an horrific amount of loss in his life. Does he know what happens after death? Not on any more of a speculative level than any one else does.
But this answer, this is something Keanu does know. I love Stephen Colbert's response as well. Just a handshake and acknowledgement of a well-said reply.