I recently created deadlines for myself by committing to an every Tuesday newsletter and now an every Friday podcast.
Deadlines are powerful — they’ve been kicking my butt and forcing me to confront so much built up resistance to authority / pressure / how I relate to time that was hidden by having no deadlines ever!
Had I resolved the problems I have with deadlines and project timelines? No, not at all!
I’d simply avoided them entirely!!
Avoidance only works for so long – because if I want to do bigger things, I have to be able to actually take action in the world and deliver results.
Real deadlines are where the rubber meets the road. They flush out the deep fault lines in consciousness that are holding us back. They’re clarifiers.
Earlier on in my trauma healing journey, I would not have been able to handle the pressure deadlines create, but at this point, I’m able to take on a few. Hey, how awesome, it only took 23 years and over 8,000 hours of therapy!
I still have to be very careful about how much pressure I put myself under, cause I don’t want to crack myself, but right now I can handle two a week.
Probably won’t be able to add more anytime in the future, but two is a lot of progress for me!
This is epic, Chris! We deeply need methods to address fears of change so we can be the self-actualized people we long to be!
One technique for fleshing out fears and addressing resistance to change is the conference table.
Make a circle on a piece of paper. Draw lines to create sections. Then go around and write all the different worries or concerns about the change, one at a time, in each pie slice of your table.
Getting this tangle of voices out of your head and out in front of you on paper is a great way to get traction about the issue!
I don’t want to be smarmy by adding a link here so I won’t, but if anyone wants a printable conference table they can find it, with more directions on how to use it, by googling “conference table ifs.”
I need to find a way to make deadlines stick for me. If there isn't something tangible on the line for me to meet the deadline, I find I flick deadlines to the side and then end up not making much progress at all.
I've been dreading this month and procrastinating all the stuff that i should be preparing for the coming weeks : my first teaching endeavour, first paper presentation, my annual PhD presentation . I've been in a complete freeze mode. I fear that I would make a fool of myself in all of these. These thoughts are not making me work / practice.
Reading this and all the comments made me feel little better.. Thank you...
I'm relatively new to starting my Substack journey - and am keen to join and help form a community of like-minded people. My Substack is called Desperately Seeking Wisdom and is for people looking for help navigating a complex world. craigoliver.substack.com. Looking to support others and get help/tips. Craig
Noticing my personal narrative is something I've been trying to work on/work through as of late...wonderful to see it presented here. So many awesome gems mentioned, thank you!
"Create Deadlines with Accountability" THIS! Is what I need to start doing. Thank you for another great read.
Ooh, thanks for repeating that Laurie.
I recently created deadlines for myself by committing to an every Tuesday newsletter and now an every Friday podcast.
Deadlines are powerful — they’ve been kicking my butt and forcing me to confront so much built up resistance to authority / pressure / how I relate to time that was hidden by having no deadlines ever!
Had I resolved the problems I have with deadlines and project timelines? No, not at all!
I’d simply avoided them entirely!!
Avoidance only works for so long – because if I want to do bigger things, I have to be able to actually take action in the world and deliver results.
Real deadlines are where the rubber meets the road. They flush out the deep fault lines in consciousness that are holding us back. They’re clarifiers.
Earlier on in my trauma healing journey, I would not have been able to handle the pressure deadlines create, but at this point, I’m able to take on a few. Hey, how awesome, it only took 23 years and over 8,000 hours of therapy!
I still have to be very careful about how much pressure I put myself under, cause I don’t want to crack myself, but right now I can handle two a week.
Probably won’t be able to add more anytime in the future, but two is a lot of progress for me!
This is epic, Chris! We deeply need methods to address fears of change so we can be the self-actualized people we long to be!
One technique for fleshing out fears and addressing resistance to change is the conference table.
Make a circle on a piece of paper. Draw lines to create sections. Then go around and write all the different worries or concerns about the change, one at a time, in each pie slice of your table.
Getting this tangle of voices out of your head and out in front of you on paper is a great way to get traction about the issue!
I don’t want to be smarmy by adding a link here so I won’t, but if anyone wants a printable conference table they can find it, with more directions on how to use it, by googling “conference table ifs.”
Course correct all day. Slowly but surely
I love the tiny experiments approach! Worst case, you get an interesting learning experience (or a good story to tell).
This is me 100%!
I need to find a way to make deadlines stick for me. If there isn't something tangible on the line for me to meet the deadline, I find I flick deadlines to the side and then end up not making much progress at all.
I've been dreading this month and procrastinating all the stuff that i should be preparing for the coming weeks : my first teaching endeavour, first paper presentation, my annual PhD presentation . I've been in a complete freeze mode. I fear that I would make a fool of myself in all of these. These thoughts are not making me work / practice.
Reading this and all the comments made me feel little better.. Thank you...
Hi Chris,
Congratulations on the great work.
I'm relatively new to starting my Substack journey - and am keen to join and help form a community of like-minded people. My Substack is called Desperately Seeking Wisdom and is for people looking for help navigating a complex world. craigoliver.substack.com. Looking to support others and get help/tips. Craig
Noticing my personal narrative is something I've been trying to work on/work through as of late...wonderful to see it presented here. So many awesome gems mentioned, thank you!