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Joselyn's avatar

There is so much I learned and unlearned from my childhood. My father was emotionally abusive. My earliest recollection of his abuse, I was eight years old. My stomach and chest would always tighten in his presence which lead to health problems. I never ever felt comfortable around him. He made me feel less than and when he called me "stupid" I believed him.

It took alot of internal work to undue the trauma I endured. I am aware of my triggers. The word "stupid" is a tigger. To this day a loving embrace between a father and daughter is a trigger. When I reaached my early 20's I was done with allowing my childhood trauma to ruin my adult life. I allowed the anger to surface and I journaled through the pain. Journaling continues to be a big part of my life.

As bad as it was, I couldn't say I would change a thing because I love my life today. I learned alot. I learned how to dismantle my childhood trauma. I learned what NOT to do when raising my sons. I learned that pain can be transformed into purpose. I learned to live in joy.

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DeathReady with T.J.'s avatar

For me, it's the 11-year old who I have been talking with in therapy. That year my sister, who was my whole world, suddenly left home (she was 18 and needed to get out for her own reasons). It left me with a fear of abandonment that still lingers. I'm finally getting a handle on it, and learning to feel compassion for her rather than being angry that she's mucking up my relationships. So much of our adult traumas arise from these childhood events... Thank you for sharing and making this a safe place to share back!

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